How to love more instead of jealous

Jealousy can kill our joy in life and our relationship. We dont need to allow it to do that to us.

So 4 ideas:

1. Awareness jealousy is just either fear of lost or fear from the past experience

Fear of lost may also come from your past experience or the behaviours of the person in the past. So you want to sit down and have a conversation with yourself, witness the thoughts which normally go with 'What if...' then let them go.

If it comes from the past behaviours of the person that triggers your brain 'she may do it again...you now want to sit down and talk through, ask instead of assume.

2. Believe in yourself again and give yourself credit 

Sometimes you dont believe in yourself so you have the fear of lost, remember you have been through a lot. Dont think when the person leaves, life ends. Remember if you love with all your heart, you let things come and go, when the person goes, something new will come, dont try to hold back. 

3. Dont hold back your love, love on the person even more 

The only way to make you feel loved is to love, the only way to receive love is to love.

When you are willing to love, you are willing to receive.

When you love more, jealousy goes.

4. Renew your relationship with your self or with the person

Do something new together every week to love yourself and the person.

 

 

How to develop growth mindset

We all want to feel fulfilled in life. Growth is one of the most fundamental factor to make us feel alive and fulfilled. We all can develop better every single day to have a better quality of life.

Here are 4 ideas to develop a growth mindset:

1. Self-belief: Believe in your ability to figure things out

Why? If you don't believe in your ability to figure things out, you will not even start or if you start, you easily quit along the way. 

How can you enhance the belief by creating a rule whenever you meet any project: I will try no matter what happen, it is better to not try! You can think about one experience you had in the past that you did well, so you can figure other things out too. Or you can use visualization to imagine you figure the project out and achieve the goal. Get excited about it.

For example: if you are an engineer, you need to make a presentation in public. Tell yourself, I will give it a try, engineering is much more complicated but you could study it, so why not public speaking - just speak. The difference is society associates the doubts and fear with public speaking while it can be the opposite - excitement. You design a beautiful product, you want to share it, you dont want to let the doubts take away the chance to bring your products to benefit others.

2. Question your doubts

Why? To free to move on. The doubts hold you back to try new things, to change for better.

How? You can question the doubts - what are the evidence for the doubts? Think about you have gone through a lot until today. And you can do it much better.

Change the doubts become curiosity - and the ability of giving it a try and figure things out. For example, even you are scared of public speaking - that what you think - you will say - let me try - I never experienced it so let me try - I will learn a new thing.

3. Master your skills by continuous learning 

You want to master your skills by reading, listening, learning from others....

You want to develop a curriculum for your skills. When you master your skills, you become more confidence and believe in yourself and vanish the doubts.

4. Learn from difficulties

Growth mindset people always look at what they can learn from a situation. 

 

How to be more discipline

You want to be more self-discplined to master your skills or to just improve your health. Self-discipline is important for anything you want to achieve.

1. Scheduling 

Without scheduling, you will just go around and randomly respond to the world. Before you get the discipline muscle strong, you want to schedule the time to practice it.

Spend 30 minutes every week to schedule how your new week look like with how many major project, which day will you do it.

Set up the alarm or put it as notes, stick it every where that you can see or in your phone.

2. Visualisation with emotional connection 

Every morning, you want to visualise to imagine yourself doing and achieving the goal. Without emotion, our brain does not motivate our action to achieve it.

And visualise 3 goals if will achieve on that day

3. Intensive blocking time 

Start with the important tasks to you before responding to anyone. 

You want to set up the block time for each important task and then you can fully focus on it, allow yourself to fully be in it, and other time is for relaxing.

For ex: I have to write today, I am gonna write before responding to anyone.

4. Social reward 

You want to celebrate so your brain know it is good so it will keep it up.

For ex: if you finish one video, call a friend and share it. If you finish reading a book, share with your friend.

How to master your emotion

Here are 4 ideas to develop a more enduring sense of self and inner strength:

 

1. Self-relience. You decide to take charge of your life. That you know you are the one who is going to change things. You’ll never know your true self until you decide to more deliberately control your focus, time, and actions.

2. Rule to direct your thoughts. Emotional mastery requires that you give yourself cues. You literally have to tell yourself how to feel and how to respond to life’s challenges. Start the morning by telling yourself how you want to feel today. Give voice to your feelings and command yourself to say and do things that make you proud.

3. Self-expression. Self-confidence is cultivated when you choose to express who you are and to believe in your ability to figure things out. That’s real confidence. You lose it when you conform with others and lose your faith in yourself. You must believe that  no matter the situation or struggle you find yourself in, you’re going to figure it out. Give yourself the gift of belief, and soon you’ll try newer and harder things and expand the very definition of your self.

4. Understanding others.  We understand ourselves the more we connect with the lives and feelings of others. So, in order to develop any emotional mastery in life, it’s important to ask people about their experiences and emotions. Notice we say “ask.” Don’t guess. It’s in making assumptions about others that we obscure true learning, about them and ourselves. You want to know yourself? Talk more with others. Authentic conversations about real life and other’s emotions makes us ask, “What do I think of that? How would I feel? Who would I be in this situation? What do I want?”

How to enjoy life

Enjoy life by bringing the joy and happiness to your life. It is my tip for anyone who has asked me 'How to enjoy life?' Or people asked 'What to bring to my events' I go 'Bring your self and the joy.'

How to bring more joy in life?

1. Take responsibility for bringing the joy, be the person who brings the joy

Set a rule for yourself that you will bring the joy to any meeting you go to, any people you meet.

2. Bring the humour 

Interrupt the negatitivity flow by bringing humour 

3. Be helpful 

4. Be supportive 

Be your BEST

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Do you strongly feel about your BEST self?

How can you live up to your BEST everyday and then you can get things done well, you feel great about yourself, you feel great about life.

1. Have clarity about who you are

- Ask yourself: what is the self that I felt great when I was it, I achieved goals when I was that self, people also felt great to be around me, what would be the self?

- If you do not feel it strongly which mean you have not practiced often enough. Remind yourself to now practice living upto that person

- Use three words to describe your best self and use triggers (e.g., alrm on phone, or reminder on laptop, or post it on your business card) to remind yourself living up to that self

2. Continous improvement

- Read, listen to inspirational materials after you wake up and before you go to sleep

- Surround youself by like-minded people

- Go to seminar, talk

Just invest in yourself everyday

3. Live with services and kindness

- Ask yourself every morning, what can you do to serve people better everyday

- Be nice to others, just simple like a smile

Shine your BEST self everyday!

jenvuhuong.com

Day 9: How to keep your integrity

How to stick to your words because our time and energy equally important, we need to respect others' time and energy as our time and energy. We do not want to say Yes then cannot delivery that may damage the relationship with others. 

4 ideas that will help you stick to your word:

#1. Know the Why and Don’t commit to everything:  Stop committing to things that you’re not passionate about or not sure that you can commit or really crucial for others. Don't think that it is good to say Yes to please people because having to say sorry as you cannot commit after saying Yes is even worse. You may think people feel good when you say Yes but the bad feeling when you do not delivery is much worse. So if you say Yes, you need to be aware of your WHY and people WHY.

#2. Respect other people’s time. Your time is not more valuable than others. Respect others’ time much as you respect and want to protect your own. Remember that everybody has priorities, life, and responsibilities. Your decision to cancel on them disrupts their day and life, and that’s not fair. You don’t want people ruining your schedule so don’t do it to others.


#3. Reevaluate before breaking your word: Sometimes, we say ‘yes’ to a lot of things but we forget the WHY when we start working on them. We forget why we said ‘yes’ in the first place and lose passion, and so we quit. Before you cancel on anything, try to remember why you originally said yes. In other words, revisit the WHY so that you’re willing to endure the struggle.

#4. Recovery. If you cancel on someone or fail to deliver, you’ve broken your word. You need to buy back your character, reputation, and integrity with an act of kindness, generosity, or attrition. You’ll have to go beyond your original commitment. Not only does this type of act regain your reputation, it also supports you on your journey to being a good person. When you mess up, be more generous. 

jenvuhuong.com

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Day 8: The BEST you

3 IDEAS about having CLARITY of your best self:

1. Define your best self - use three words to describe your best self 

2. How does your best self interact with people - use three ways to describe your intention when interacting with people

3. What made you succeed - use the successful patterns to achieve new goals

DETAILS: 

1. Your best self. 

- Have clearly thought about who you want to be and who your ideal self would be on a day-to-day basis.

- Articulately describe who the person you are trying to become 

- Exercise: 3 words to describe your best self > reminding yourself to live up to that person (for example: in your notebook; your phone) > share it with people to keep accountability 

2. Interactions With Others. 

- Have clarity about how you want to interact with others

- Know your values and people's values, respect other ideas

-  What kind of impression and relationship you want with others

- Exercise: before you walk into meetings, spend some minutes to set clear intentions for how to interact with others

3. What Makes You Succeed

- What specific things made you succeed in the past?  Are you doing those things consistently this year? Define your successful patterns and reinforce it, apply it with bigger scales, bigger effort and you will get bigger results.

Exercise:

+ The conscious awareness of the tactics, habits, and mindsets that have made you successful in the past: 3 key patterns

+ Re-scale it and re-evaluate to see what work, what does not work

+ Learn from the people who have achieved big results in the field that you want, you also can model them and you may be surprised that they may share with you what you already know, so the question is that - Have you done it consitently?

Day 7: What to do when you feel lost

Yes you can find yourself again!

3 ideas to do when you get lost: 

1. Engagement. You don't need to suffer feeling lost by yourself. Just engage with your friends and your family to gain another perspectives. Just go for a drink and listen to people's stories or tell your stories and  share your stories. Just need to look at things in other perspectives. 


2. Giving more. Just give more, care more for people. When you think for others more than yourself, you get engaged with your deep self again. Do some volunteer work, do something nice to others. 

3. See it as the way it is but not worse. At least you don't make it worse, see it as the way it is. Gain momentum by getting things done. When you take action, even small thing, you gain the momentum again. 

jenvuhuong.com

Day 5: How to stay focus

To be more focused:

1. Take control of one hour after you wake up: 20 minutes feeding your mind by reading/listening personal development materials + 20 minutes planning gratitude mindset goals of days and improvement in doing things + 20 minutes exercise 

2. Triggers/blocking time to refresh after each task 

3. Take control of one hour before going to sleep: reading and writing gratitude journal instead of surfing 

 

 

BELIEVE again

BELIEVE again

Believe again in our dreams

Believe again in our ability of figure things out

Believe again in life

1. Think about everyday as an new opportunity to believe again in ourselves, dreams, and others

2. Believe in our ability of figure things out

3. Believe in the power of choosing which meaning to give into life

Believe in ourselves then people believe with us and believe in themselves...

Believe in u!

PASSION: Infinitive RESOURCE of energy: 29 days challenge to breakthrough

PASSION: PASS MISSION TO ACTION 

1. Identify your mission in life 

Remember you are more than your physical body. Knowing that you live not only for you. 

If you do not know exactly your mission, just learn to progress everyday. 

2. Action

What to do to develop your skills everyday. If you know your mission, then you just need to take action that matter to your mission.

Remember the key elements is to grow and to give.

3. Honor the struggle and bring joy to what you do

 

ENERGY: 29days challenge to breakthrough

How to create and sustain ENERGY?

Firstly, the mindset toward energy should be: ENERGY is created by ourselves. We have infinitive energy that we just need to tap into it and make it flow.

Secondly, apply this model: WATER model 

1. Water: drink more water 

Remember our body is more than 70% water

Remember the planet has more than 70% 

So go back to the nature.

Tip: put lemon in the water in the early morning

2. Action

Ask what can you learn everyday? What can you give people everyday? (even just a smile or kindness action) What do you feel thankful everyday (GRATITUDE)?

3. Triggers 

Set up the alarm to remind yourself to stay present! 

Or set up schedule to call your friends or accountable partner to stay motivated 

4. Exercise and go green 

Mind exercise and body exercise and eat more green 

5. Reason: reconnect with your purpose everyday 

The fundamental of purpose is to grow and give joyfully to make a difference in life.

Have an energetic day!

Love,

Jen,

How to design a great day

3 questions to desing your great day when you wake up:

1. what do you feel thankful for? (GRATITUDE for the mind)

Focus on gratitude > happier > more productive

2. Focus: what goals do you FOCUS today? (for PROGRESSING)

The daily goals should move you towards your life goals.

3. What can you do differently today? (for raising STANDARDS)

Youtube and Podcast:

How to stay motivated - self-motivation

The key thing is MOTIVATION does not exist until the moment we create it.

Motivation is self-created.

Anyone can motivate you for some moments, to sustain the motivation, you need to create it every single day until it becomes a 'habit'.

How to create your self-motivation/intrinsic motivation - not extrinsic motivation (intrinsic motivation: personally desire; extrinsic motivation: external reward).

1. Be ambitious/hungry: Knowing your desire, ambition, big goals, or purpose 

Every single day, you need to re-connect with it, visualize it emotionally connect with it.

2. Empowering beliefs: Believing in your ability of figure thing out

3. Progress: get 3 things done everyday to move toward your ambition/desire

4. Attitude: Fully responsibility of your life and gratitude toward life

5. Focus

My study with 334 students shows that intrinsic motivation is directly connected to attitude while extrinsic motivation does not.

Be self-motivated everyday.