Hi and Bye "Chaos"

Yesterday, a close friend of mine left Vietnam to go back to his hometown. My mentor is one of the toughest people I have ever met. He truly cares about humility and the planet. He has experienced incredible moments,being attacked by wild tigers or lions in the forests or wild elephants in African desserts. Death didn’t seem to scare him. Nor did the recent chaos in the world.

However,…

This recent month, everything came at once - he got sick, his daughters felt more and more worried, his mum suffered an anxiety attack, all of his projects came to a standstill because his business partners were shut down. Every day his family would call him, asking him to return home, expressing their fear because of the chaos.

Worried, anxious, scared, … experiencing mixed feelings…week after week…I could notice his concern for some days due to all of the things came up…

It seemed these emotions affected him more profoundly than his previous encounters with death…I was worried but I also had a strong conviction, that he would figure it out…because he did it many times in the past!

And he did!

He took all of these in peace.

He figured out his work, he checked up his health. He went back home in the US to take care of his mum. Piece by piece …everything was figured out …

He already figured out many difficult things before – and even death! So he will this time and he is doing it!

So DO YOU! You have gone through many challenges to be here today, so you will this time.

If you are reading this, maybe you have experienced some  similar feelings or you haven’t personally, but you may see people in all over the world experience such feelings.– and the truth is, we have gone through many other challenges before – and we will this time.

SITUATION DOES NOT DEFINE US BUT REVEAL WHO WE ARE!

Here are some ideas to keep us strong to take steps forward instead of backward:

1.       See thingss as they are, not worse than they are

2.       Go through things by re-defining your purpose – what matters to you and why do you do what you do

3.       Evaluate your current performance in relation with achieving your goal – what works and what doesn’t

4.       Create values that are suitable for consumers to consume in this moment in time

5.       Work with others, collaboration can move things further

If we make the “virus” of being disciplined at taking care of ourselves and supporting others, we will together overcome this real virus.

Have a great week ahead my friends!

Yours,

Jen,

The power of GRATITUDE

Gratitude
[Thói quen giúp ngủ ngon làm việc hiệu quả, thúc đẩy mối quan hệ tích cực]
What do you feel thankful for today?

One day, in our Hanoi Entrepreneur Community, a dear friend asked me about my practice on gratitude, it would be one of my favorite questions of all time because gratitude changed me from a bitter kid to become a cheerful kid and brought me back from different down moments in life.

WHY gratitude can change us?
The fundamental reason can be gratitude shifts our focus. When you feel thankful, your focus follows so your energy goes to that direction, leaving behind the negativity.

WHAT are the daily practices for gratitude?
To think about what do you feel grateful for, it can be at a conscious level of before evening or after waking up or it can be an instant moment of reflection after each event!

And yes, after that gratitude feeling in the morning, it will be great to bring that energy to complete the first important project to create results to reinforce our habits of being grateful!

hank for reading and practicing gratitude with me my friends! You are my gratitude!
#jenvuhuong #lovelivegive #gratitude #30ngaythaydoithoiquen

p/s: GRATITUDE IMPACT proven by research:
0. Grateful people sleep better
According to a 2011 study published in Applied Psychology: Health and Well-Being, you may sleep better and longer by spending 15 minutes to write down what do you feel thankful for before bed
1. Gratitude opens the door to more relationships
According to a 2014 study published in Emotion, thanking a new acquaintance makes them more likely to seek an ongoing relationship
2. Gratitude improves physical health
According to a 2012 study published in Personality and Individual Differences, grateful people are also more likely to take care of their health
3. Gratitude enhances empathy and reduces aggression
According to a 2012 study by the University of Kentucky, participants who ranked higher on gratitude scales were less likely to retaliate against others, even when given negative feedback

Your story matters

When I was in the UK, every month I went to a story telling event where most people were native speakers.

As a little girl coming from the countryside of Vietnam, telling a story in English language in front of around 200 people made my stomach moving ...I could hear my little voice "people would not understand you..." Have you ever felt that before? You wanted to speak up and that voice came up...

But then I also had a strong feeling that "my message is important enough for me to share with others and that I was inspired by people who shared their stories and someone could also be inspired by my stories"...

That desire of sharing won the little voice and I could not be more thankful that after my sharing, people would come and say they believed in themselves more thanks to my story.

I noticed there was an uncle at the age of more than 60, always came to the event. I often saw him look at me speaking, not having any emotion or reaction - it was link blank. I heard a voice telling me "he would not feel interested in stories of a little kid coming from the countryside like me". Have you ever heard a voice like, just because of the reaction on someone's face?

Until one day, after my story about how did I overcome my own doubts when changing my career, he came to me and said "you rock, little girl. I often tell your stories to my grandchildren, you inspire them! Thank you".

I was touched by what he said!

I realized we sometimes caught up by the delusion of our own doubts, making us assume things and distract a part of our energy on thinking on being judged.

And if we fully focused on just sharing, serving for good - we would be free from all these doubts and fear, and fully sink into the message.

As I have learned a lot about myself and others through telling stories and listening to stories, I created Story Jam to welcome you come to share your stories or listen to others' stories.

It is a part of the journey of understanding more about you and connecting with others. You have a chance to speak up, exercising your confidence, competence, creativity, communication, collaboration, commitment and compassion (7Cs of Cspeaking gym jenvuhuong.com/cspeakinggym).

Cannot wait to hear your stories and your confidence you shine!

Tomorrow, you will come? https://www.facebook.com/events/512904679367627/
Talk soon,

Jen,

Hugs, touch and Transformation

"What are you doing? Something happens to you?", Anna removed Brian's hands off her hands.
Brian told me the first reaction of his mother when he touched her hands after many years of not meeting each other.
His mum, Anna had lived by herself for long and she lived in a violent family in which people would not express the feelings for each other by hugging or touching.
Seeing Anna's reaction but knowing deep down, she would feel some connection from his touch, Brian told himself to slowly introduce touching and hugging to his mum.
Each day, later on, he would gently touch her, on shoulders or sometimes on the back. Some first weeks, mum kept telling him "what matters to you?" Brian just smiled.
Week by week, Anna started getting used to the touching of Brian, instead of quickly resisting, she kept silent.
After almost a year, Anna proactively touched and hugged Brian. She would demand Brian hug her whenever he left the house or seeing her. She also started being more open to hug others. She became happier and it had a lot to do with the patience of Brian when introducing Anna to a way of expressing care, love, and connection - hugging, touching!

It is beautiful, isn't it?
(Science also says about hugs' benefits:
1. Hugs reduce stress by showing your support
2. Hugs may boost your heart health
3. Hugs help you communicate with others)

Who will you hug today to show your care?

Comparing to developing

On
Comparing
[So sánh] [Tiếng Việt ở dưới]

Question: How to not let comparing others make you feel bad?

My sharing:
The first thing is to acknowledge this question comes from a deeper desire – the desire of being emotional freedom.

Secondly, comparing is an automatic mechanism of us to help us survive when living with each other. Hence, we want to acknowledge all the feelings coming from comparing but not letting these feelings lead to disempowering afterward action…

Thirdly, using principles: comparing that empowers us to believe more in what can we do, to take bolder action to better ourselves then it is a healthy comparison; comparing that makes us feel less of ourselves then it is not a healthy comparison.

If we have feelings such as ‘We are not good as others’, it means we are doubtful about ourselves rather it is a truth. We want to re-center to be back to work on ourselves. Spend 100% on developing and serving! (The bird can fly high when each of them focuses on flying)

And what we feel when comparing has a lot to do what do we see ourselves, if we believe in ourselves and we believe in others, we feel content/excited for others rather than missing.

Here are some practices we can try to not let comparing feelings disempower us:
- Acknowledge the feelings
- Ask ourselves what can we learn from others
- Recenter, re-affirm our core values
- Focus on what we can do better

I believe that you are great!
Jen,
...
So sánh

Câu hỏi: Làm thế nào để không để việc so sánh với người khác tạo ảnh hưởng xấu?

Chia sẻ của tôi:
Điều đầu tiên là thừa nhận câu hỏi trên xuất phát từ một mong muốn sâu sắc hơn - mong muốn được tự do về cảm xúc.

Thứ hai, so sánh là một cơ chế tự động của chúng ta để giúp chúng tôi tồn tại. Do đó, chúng ta thừa nhận tất cả những cảm xúc đến từ việc so sánh nhưng KHÔNG để những cảm xúc này dẫn đến hành động không xuất phát từ con người tốt nhất của chúng ta (bạn có thể sử dụng nguyên tắc sau)

Thứ ba, sử dụng nguyên tắc: việc so sánh cho phép chúng ta tin tưởng hơn vào những gì chúng ta có thể làm, để có hành động táo bạo hơn để cải thiện bản thân thì đó là một so sánh lành mạnh; việc so sánh làm cho chúng ta cảm thấy tự ti hơn về bản thân mình hoặc ghen tị thì đó không phải là một so sánh lành mạnh.

Nếu chúng ta có những cảm xúc như "Chúng ta không tốt như những người khác", điều đó có nghĩa là chúng ta nghi ngờ về bản thân mình - và việc chúng ta không tốt không hẳn là một sự thật. Lúc đó, chúng ta cần tái trung tâm để trở lại làm tốt mình hơn. Dùng 100% năng lượng cho việc chúng ta có thể làm tốt hơn.

Những gì chúng ta cảm thấy khi so sánh có thể đến từ chính những gì chúng ta cảm thấy về chính mình (và khoảnh khắc chúng ta nhìn thấy người khác đã kích hoạt cách chúng ta nhìn chúng ta), nếu chúng ta tin vào chính mình và chúng ta tin vào người khác, chúng ta cảm thấy hài lòng/ngưỡng mộ hơn là thiếu khi so sánh.

Dưới đây là một số thói quen giúp chúng ta không để so sánh cảm xúc làm chúng ta thất vọng:
- Công nhận cảm xúc xuất hiện khi so sánh
- Tự hỏi bản thân chúng ta có thể học được gì từ người khác
- Tái tập trung, khẳng định lại giá trị cốt lõi của chúng tôi
- Tập trung vào những gì chúng ta có thể làm tốt hơn

Tin vào chính bạn! Phát triển chính bạn và tất cả chúng ta cùng phát triển!

Jen,

Never limit yourself (JAJ2020)

[Hỏi Jen -JAJ]

In 2020, what will you double down on?

I will double down on sharing! I will share more of the questions that I get from people and answer them so maybe if you are on the same journey, you can get some other perspectives.

[Trong năm 2020, bạn sẽ nhân đôi điều gì? Mình sẽ nhân đôi việc chia sẻ các câu hỏi các bạn nhắn tin hỏi mình để có thể những bạn có cùng câu hỏi sẽ có thêm cách nhìn]

Question:

"I am a person who loves to contribute to society and the community. When someone asks me about my expected salary, I said X million salary and people think it is too much for community work. I don't know whether my thinking is too practical or too dreaming but I want to have a higher salary compared to the average salary because I want to then help people in a more sustainable way"

Jen's sharing: It is great when you know what do you love to do - your drives - contribution (to society and community).

It is also great that you dare to define your expected salary (it somehow reflects how confident you feel about the values you can add to others).

Which means the 2 topics do not conflict with each other. One is your human drive, and the other is how you reflect values you can add through the expected salary. I observe and see people normally underestimate their value rather than over-estimate (which means the salary you expect may not even reflect the true value you can add, maybe it can be higher).

Another thing is "who are others? the people told you to want a high salary? maybe it came from someone but after all - coming from YOU - so yes, it reflects your belief about your self worth!

So I would ask the following questions to clear out all the doubts:

- I know what I truly want? contributing to the community? great, how would I do it is...

and I do it by...

- I believe in my worth, and the salary I expect is...

and It reflects the values I can add to wherever I work ...

...

Câu hỏi:

Em có 1 tình huống khó xử: em là một người thích làm một công việc đóng góp cho cộng đồng và xã hội. Khi được hỏi về mức lương mong muốn em có chia sẻ là X triệu VND. Mọi người coi là số tiền đó không hợp lý vì khi làm 1 công việc liên quan đến cộng đồng thì cần nhận lương thấp. Em có mơ mộng hay thực thục dụng quá không chị?

Chia sẻ từ Jen:

Chúc mừng bạn vì bạn đã xác định được điều mình muốn làm : đóng góp cho cộng đồng và xã hội.

Chúc mừng bạn cũng đã xác định được mức lương mình mong muốn (một phần nào đó, nó phản ánh niềm tin của bạn vào giá trị bạn có thể cho đi khi bạn làm 1 công việc nào đó)

Và 2 chủ đề này không mâu thuẫn nhau. Một là động lực/điều bạn coi trọng trong cuộc sống và Một là một con số phản ánh định giá về giá trị bạn có thể cho đi khi đi làm 1 việc nào đó.

(thường mình thấy mọi người định giá giá trị họ có thể cho đi ít hơn so với giá trị thực sự họ có thể cho đi, nên bạn thậm chí có thể tăng con số mức lương bạn xứng đáng nếu giá trị bạn cho đi cao hơn thế)

Một góc cạnh nữa là - bạn có thấy mọi người đánh giá về việc bạn muốn lương quá cao - một trong những người này có thể là "chính bạn" nói với bạn, và một phần nó phản ánh có thể bạn đang phần nào vẫn hoài nghi về giá trị bạn có thể cho đi.

Vậy là bạn có thể hỏi mình:

- Tôi thực sự biết tôi muốn gì? điều tôi coi trọng là được đóng góp cho cộng đồng? tuyệt vời, tôi làm việc đó bằng cách...

- Tôi tin vào giá trị của tôi, mức lương tôi mong muốn là...

và những giá trị tôi cho đi tương xứng với mức lương đo là...

Mình sẽ đăng bài chia sẻ video qua kênh youtube mới:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCG2CJV3wUx62nnvZyepImfg

TET

“How do you like to eat it? with tomatoes or with bean sauce?”

Mum asked me about how did I like to eat the fish this morning because she didn’t see me eat because everything was meat yesterday.

It is a great warm gift of the morning from mum.

TET (Chinese New Year in the Lunar Calendar) is great time when we spend more time together.

I am taking TET as an inspiration to create new meaning around it:

Thankfulness

Excitement

Timeless

Thanks and happy TET my friends!

You can figure it out

[Tiếng Việt phía dưới]

"A tired bird landed on a branch. The bird rested, enjoying the view from the branch and the protection it offered from dangerous animals. Just as the bird became used to the branch and the support and safety it offered, a strong wind started blowing, and the tree swayed with such intensity that it seemed the branch would snap in half.

But the bird was not worried for it knew two important truths. The first truth – even without the branch it was able to fly, and thus remain safe through the power of its own two wings. The second truth – it also knew that there are many other branches upon which it can temporarily rest."

What do you get from the story? Sometimes we make things worse than it is and forget we have the capability to deal with any difficulties if we believe so!

Sometimes when you start doing something new, like starting a career or learning a new skill or moving to a new place, you start feeling like everything will be difficult and doubt yourself. There are 2 truths: you at least step out of your comfort zone and you will figure it out because you did that before.

Sometimes before getting on a stage to speak or share something, we think the world will end if you could not speak clearly. There are 2 truths: you at least just do one thing to make you step out of your comfort zone and you always can be better by practice.

Believe in your ability to figure things out my friends! I believe in you!

Yours,

Jen

...

Một chú chim mệt mỏi đáp xuống một cành cây. Chú chim nghỉ ngơi, tận hưởng khung cảnh từ cành cây và cảm giác an toàn được cành cây che chở khỏi những con thú dữ. Khi chú chim bắt đầu cảm thấy thoải mái với cành cây và không gian xung quanh, một cơn gió mạnh thổi đến và cây đung đưa với cường độ mạnh đến nỗi dường như cành cây sẽ gãy làm đôi.

Nhưng chú chim không lo lắng vì nó biết có hai sự thật quan trọng. Sự thật đầu tiên - ngay cả khi không có cành cây nó có thể bay, và do đó nó vẫn an toàn vì có sức mạnh của hai cánh của chính nó. Sự thật thứ hai - nó cũng biết rằng có nhiều cành cây khác mà nó có thể tạm thời nghỉ ngơi.

Bạn nhận được điều gì từ câu chuyện này? Có thể nhiều lúc chúng ta khiến mọi việc xấu hơn so với thực tế mà quên đi là chúng ta có tiềm năng để vượt qua mọi khó khăn.

Nhiều lúc bạn bắt đầu một công việc mới hay học một kỹ năng mới hay đến sinh sống ở một nơi mới, bạn nghĩ rằng mọi thứ sẽ rất khó khăn và nghi ngờ về khả năng của mình. Có 2 sự thật là: ít nhất bạn đã bước ra khỏi vòng an toàn khi làm nó và bạn đã trải qua khó khăn trước đây , bạn sẽ vượt qua khó khăn mới bằng cách đối diện với nó, làm nó.

Nhiều lúc bạn quyết định bước lên chia sẻ trước đám đông, bạn tự nói với mình là trái đất sẽ sụp đổ vì bạn có thể không nói được rõ ràng. Có 2 sự thật là: ít nhất bạn đã vượt qua khỏi vòng an toàn và bạn luôn có thể tốt hơn bằng cách thực hành.

Tin vào khả năng bạn có thể tìm ra giải pháp vì đó là cánh cửa đưa bạn đến giải pháp!

Tôi tin vào bạn!

Yours,

Jen,

Change how you say to change how you do

"I am bored"

"I am tired"

"I am ok"

Have you ever told yourself that? And after that maybe you feel better? No, you feel not great after saying it!

“Language shapes our behavior and each word we use is imbued with multitudes of personal meaning. The right words spoken in the right way can bring us love, money and respect, while the wrong words—or even the right words spoken in the wrong way — can lead to a country to war. We must carefully orchestrate our speech if we want to achieve our goals and bring our dreams to fruition. — Dr. Andrew Newberg, Words Can Change Your Brain”

Each time we say these things to ourselves, it is like a command to our brain to trigger our brain focusing on sadness, tiredness or "okness" but not the JOY or GREATNESS. And with that, you take action on that not great state of mind leading to not good results.

The good news is that we can change this habit! We can start changing what to say to ourselves to then trigger the JOY and GREATNESS leading to better action.

And the idea is not about trying to IGNORE our feelings - that we actually feel but actually is ACKNOWLEDGE the feelings but then DOING things to change it, we do not need to stay there for so long!

We acknowledge the feelings then change the words leading to a better state of mind then better action:

"I am bored" > "I may feel bored but one thing I can do now to feel the JOY is..."

"I am tired" > "I may feel tired but one thing I can do now to generate ENERGY is..."

"I am ok" > "I am ok maybe not feeling great yet but one thing I can do now to EXCITE me is..."

***

More ways to change what make us think less of ourselves:

“It is not for me” > “If it is working for them, let me give it a try”

“I am not good at that” > “If it is important enough, let me learn to be better”

“I do not know” > “if it is important, let me learn to master it”

What other sentences you have told yourself that have held you back, tell us we will work it out with you!

JOY triggers

Have you ever felt tired or bored when you wake up in the morning?

You properly said, "oh, another day?"

You scroll your phone and start seeing all the bad news and you start feeling the araising feelings of sadness or uncertainty or worries.

But maybe you sometimes feel "wow, today will be awesome" and you feel you are taking ownership of your life.

So how will you increase the days that you feel "awesome" - feel the joy of life? I used to struggle with the question and thankfully, I had chances to work with different awesome people and learn from personal development books, I found a common sense of a joyful life - our own CHOICE.

In the legend book "The 7 habits of effective people", one of the habits mentioned is "be proactive"

and in the 3rd leadership book on Amazon "High-performance Habits", one of the habits of highly successful people is to live intentionally.

So it means, we can proactively and intentionally trigger the feelings we want to experience - we can bring JOY to our life.

How can we do bring the JOY? We can identify different moments that often make us feel not great and set triggers of JOY:

1. Set notification trigger in your phone saying "bring the joy"

(from High Performance Habits book)

2. Set door frame trigger at your home or your office saying "bring the joy"

3. Set waiting trigger while you wait for traffic light or for food

4. Set a trigger to hug someone to say hi

5. Set a trigger to surprise someone

What else do you do to bring the joy?

Bring the Joy

I remember one time I did a survey asking people about their regular feelings on each day of a week.

Here is what I found:

Monday 🙄

Tuesday 😏

...

Friday 😋

Saturday 😀😃

Sunday 😊

The happy feelings, the joy increases as weekend comes because they do not to work or study anymore.

I thought to myself, so they had most days which they were not happy?

I shared the idea of BRINGING THE JOY with them so they could have more joyful happy days.

This is a habit that we proactively create the JOY and HAPPINESS instead of waiting until one day or weekend.

There are different ways to bring the joy:
- Surprise someone
- Walk in nature
- Crack a joke
- Say Hi to a stranger
- Learn a new thing
- Share an idea
- Talk with an awesome friend

What is your favourite way?

7Cs of Storytelling

7Cs of Cspeaking gym is about personal and leadership development! But let's “make up” 7Cs for storytelling to celebrate for our Story Jam - a special session happening every first meeting of a month because Storytelling is a crucial part of leadership and communication!

C1 – Cultivate stories in every moments of life

To have a story or stories to tell, we can take notes on some interesting moments happening every day!  Basically, building a database of stories so later on we can access to it when needed!

C2 – Capture the audience at the beginning of your speech by using IMAGINE

Using Imagine to embrace the curiosity of the audience, triggering their imagination then emotions!

C3 - Create suspense

Make the audience curious and remember your stories by creating suspense - a conflict or turning point!

C4- Characterize people in stories

Make the audience see, hear and feel the characters of the story!

C5- Connect with the audiences

Connect with the audience by asking questions – making them think and then reflect so they can experience the transformation process as you do!

C6- Choose to show not to tell

Showing them by using vivid languages or sounds!

C7- Conclude with call for action

This is to answer the “So What questions”

We can ACHIEVE what the mind can PERCEIVE

---We hiked in the rain with a 4-year old kid and 65-year old man---

(This post is inspired by my dear sis and friend, my family in Spain Lidia Pérez - happy birthday to you)!

--- This experience made me believe more that "Ages cannot limit what we can do

as long as our mind believes we can"

(Tuổi tác thực sự không giới hạn được điều chúng ta có thể làm

nếu tâm trí chúng ta tin không giới hạn chúng ta)----

When I was in Spain, I often organized a hiking trip in the weekend. Have you been there? Costa Brava beach surrounded by mountains, really beautiful! It was always a reward of myself and my friends after a hard working week^^

I remember that day, we scheduled to go for hiking and the weather turned out to be not as it was forecasted.

30 minutes before we supposed to start, It rained even heavier. One of my friends told me that we should cancel it.

Before deciding, I called to Lidia Pérez and asked if she came because Lidia was my first close friend and dear sister in Spain who always came to any meeting and event that I organized (if you are reading it, Lidia, thank you and love you). Lidia said her dad and her on the way to the meeting point.

Right after that, I got a call from a strange number. It was a new member (who knew our event through Meetup). He called me and told me that his family was waiting in the meeting point. And he said a boy and his wife.

My mentor always told me if we organized something, even one person came - we had to do it as well as 1000 people came. I told him without hesitation "I am coming!"

I felt pumped when arriving at the meeting point and seeing the 4-year old kid and Lidia Pérez's father, 65-year old man and they were both excited to go.

It did not stop raining when we arrived at the hiking place, but we made it. It was quite slippery so some of us fell on the way but seeing the 4-year old kid and the 65-year old uncle kept hiking, we got charged and helped each other to make it till the end.

Really, the mind made it happen - not the ages! This picture showed the happy faces of everyone after finishing hiking! The happy feeling of overcoming a challenge together, despite ages or weather!

No matter how old you are, what you do or where you are from, I believe you can do what you want to do if your mind can perceive it! as the kid and the man did!

Can we be friends? THE ACT OF KINDNESS!

Can we be friends?

This was a sentence that made our friendship - Deepika Sindhu and me - and then brought me a beautiful family in India.

The first time I met Deepika was when I attended a one-month training in Samsung India. I sat in one corner of the office and Deepika sat on the other corner, the office is quite huge.

Anytime I saw her, she smiled at me, warm smiles. After around one week, she came to me and gave me a big smile "Can we be friends?".

My eyes sparkled and it was a definite yes coming from my eyes! She was so cute as right after that, she pulled another girl next to me and said: "she also wants to be your friend".

It made my day!

We started saying hi and getting to know each other more since then. Deepika asked me to visit her family but I didn't make it that time. We kept in touch when I went back to Vietnam (thanks to her, she helped me to be in touch). Deepika would call me and let me talk with her parents and her brother, I felt really loved by them.

Some months later, I decided to go back to India and I managed to visit Deepika's family.

And it became one of the most memorable loving events in my life - the visit to her family.

When I arrived at her village, I saw everyone in the village went to the road to say Hi to me. The village was bright with the smiles of everyone. I was overwhelmed by their welcoming and got even more overwhelmed when arriving at her house.

Her parents and her brother already prepared all the food for me, her brother even went to buy ice creams for me, and they kept asking if I wanted to eat anything else.

It turned out I felt full ^^ really just with their love, I didn't eat much.

I would never forget this memory, thanks Deepika and your loving family, always love!

Hope you have a loving time, making a good memory for someone as Deepika's family did to me!

THE LITTLE GIRL WHO FOUND HER LIGHTHOUSE

Once upon a time, a little girl got lost in a forest. While the sun was setting, she saw a lighthouse in the distance and tried to run toward it. She ran as fast as her little legs allowed her, jumping through bushes and over fallen trees, but the more she ran, the farther away from her the lighthouse appeared to be. She was confused and scared. She tried to run toward the lighthouse again but, as she did, the lighthouse seemed to keep moving farther and farther away. She felt lost and couldn't understand what was happening.

The more confused she felt, the faster she tried to run, and the farther away from her the lighthouse appeared to be. On her way this time, she noticed that there was a large hole at the side of the road, a hole deep enough to contain a tall person. In fact, there was a person in the hole – an old man with long gray hair. He seemed to be trapped , but his face was bright and sported a genuine smile. Forgetting that she was in a hurry, the little girl stopped to help the man out of the hole. As she approached him, she began to feel a different feeling. Her confusion receded; she felt joy. 

Getting close to the hole, the little girl said, "Let me help you out of there."

The man lifted his gaze to the girl, smiled and said, "I’m fine. I’m not trapped. I’m connected to this hole."

“How can you be connected to it? It trapped you, didn’t it?” the girl asked.

The man smiled. “I have freed my mind. We are only really trapped when we think we are. I can free my physical body with ease because my mind is free.” Saying this, he showed her that he could step out of the hole effortlessly.

The man’s words awoke something inside of the little girl. A flourishing feeling went throughout her body. She could hear her heart pounding, she could feel the wind caressing her skin. She could hear the rustling of the trees, and perceive the colour of the sun shining through the leaves.

“Where are you going, little girl?” the man asked, bringing the little girl back from her meditations.

“I have been following the road to the lighthouse. It seemed to be this way, but the more I ran, the farther away from me it appeared to be. But now, somehow I think I have finally found it.”

The man smiled. “Yes. It is here. You are already living within it. When you run, you lose touch with it. Just slow down and feel it.”

The little girl closed her eyes. She took a deep breath and started feeling each cell of her body being energised. She looked up and saw the lighthouse in the sky, and a warm feeling overflowed in her heart. She could feel the earth through all of her senses. She enjoyed being in the present, in front of her lighthouse. She stopped chasing the illusion of the exterior lighthouse and allowed herself to light up her inner, personal lighthouse.

Feeling the lighthouse inside her heart, the little girl opened her eyes. The forest was not the forest anymore. It was crowded with people, animals, and trees. She found herself in the city of the lighthouse. Everyone had a lighthouse inside them and lit the whole city. Everyone smiled. Everyone looked extremely happy and present. The little girl felt like she was in heaven. She felt a warm feeling more than ever, she smiled to think about going back to share her story of finding the lighthouse to her hometown.

On her own way, she saw the old man that she had met in the forest. He was talking with a group of people. They were laughing and cracking jokes while talking with each other. She approached him to say hi.

Her heart stopped pounding because of being surprised…

The man was talking with her family.

She realised…

The city she was NOW in was her hometown.

Where is your lighthouse? Where is your target? What is your purpose? Are you living up to it every moment, or are you endlessly chasing the illusion of it?

Do you keep running without feeling the purposeful present moment? Are you losing sight of the big picture?

There is no way to PASSION, passion is the way! Live with Passion and you feel the existence of it! Generate Passion everyday!

Develop your Competence: Repetition with Reflection

Around 10 years ago, I didn’t enjoy running at all because I found my calves get bigger despite my trying of different techniques.

One day, I was in Zaragoza, Spain for a weekend trip. I stayed in a local person’s house with other two good friends of mine. The host is a super fit guy; we could tell when we saw him and the vibe he generated. I was excited to learn more about his exercise routines because I am a big fan of doing exercise.

He gave us a tour around his house when we arrived. The house is decorated nicely with different family pictures and his achievement in studying and sports. But the thing amazed me the most was different numbers near his working desk. I saw these numbers increase as the dates changed. These numbers made me curious. Seeing me stare at these numbers, the host smiled “I tracked my running every week, when the numbers changed, I felt motivated to practice more because I found the sense of my growth. That’s a nice feeling, isn't it? Do you like running?” ,

His words and the numbers hooked me!

And you may guess what happened after that! Did I like the guy? Or I liked running?

His words and the numbers hooked me!

And you may guest what happened after that! I liked the guy? Or I liked running?

The answer is both!

I started telling myself to try his technique to train myself to run. The feeling of developing my competence in running over-weighted the worry about the big calves and yes I found that I could do a longer yoga to linear my calves. After each day of running, I reflected on the time and the way I ran and then set a new target for the next day. I then could attend a marathon and also went running up and down to the hill every day.

With the repetition and tracking the progress, I became better at running. And I found the same thing happen whenever I learn other things such as speaking. I would schedule to speak on one topic everyday and track the time as well as the points that I delivered in each speech. The next day I would challenge myself to do at least one thing differently in the same speech such as speaking in less time while delivering the same points. And anytime I did not repeat the practicing process or reflecting to improve, I did not feel a sense of growth then I did not motivate much to practice more.

So, repeat practicing one skill then reflect to improve upon that will help you and me to develop better everyday then be more confident leading to better results in what we do.

Join me today, everyday to try the technique my friends!

P/S: This topic is inspired by Cspeaking gym - the leadership development program where 7Cs of leadership is empowered: Confidence, Competence, Communication, Creativity, Collaboration, Commitment, Compassion.

https://www.facebook.com/cspeakinggym/

The goal achiever

On welcoming the coming of my new book THE GOAL ACHIEVER, let’s review some other books on goal setting.

One of the classical books is Goals!: How to Get Everything You Want — Faster Than You Ever Thought Possible by one of the biggest names on training about goal setting - Brian Tracy.

Here is my favorite take away:

1. Decide exactly what you want in every key area of your life

2. Write it down

3. Set a deadline

4. Identify the obstacles that you will have to overcome to achieve your goal

5. Identify the knowledge, information and skills you will need to achieve your goal

6. Identify the people whose help and cooperation you will require to achieve your goal

7. Make a list of everything you will have to do to achieve your goal

8. Make a plan. Organize your list into a series of steps from the beginning all the way through to the completion of your goal

9. Daily action

In the next post, I will share about another takeaway from other books on the goal setting topic!

An act of kindness can make a person day

Gratitude
"He" (my red cap) back in the rain...

It was a peaceful evening after I finished a long training, I took a grab bike to go back to my house and it started raining on our way. We managed to arrive at my house before it started raining heavily. I said thanks to the grab driver and returned to him his helmet and that when I found that I lost my cap. 
The drive jumped out of the bike and helped me to look around but we couldn’t find it. The rain got heavier so I suggested him to not worry and that I had another cap at home. The fact was that I really wanted to look for the cap; it was an extremely inexpensive cap but was extremely meaningful to me because it had been with me for almost 1 year in my every morning running session. After the driver left, I tried to look around again and looked in my bags but I couldn’t find it. I tried to recall the last time I saw it – it was when I put it on my head before putting the helmet. This led to the possible reason that I lost it on the way. I told myself, yes, I would get another cap and I could create a new meaningful journey with the new cap. And yes, I told myself to be more careful in the future (that is what my sister always reminds me every day).
With that self-talk, I walked inside the house and left the story behind and got excited to go back to my house after a long trip!
While I was about climbing on the staircase, I heard somebody drove motorbike stopping in front of my house. I tried to look into the darkness to see he was that and saw someone that was quite familiar.
It was the grab driver!
He came back in the rain and gave me my cap – which he found on the way! 
And he left with a smile!
This smile and his act of kindness made me want to share it with you! Hope you have a beautiful smile before sleeping my friends and maybe be someone to bring the smile to others like the grab driver!

Are You INTERESTED Or Are You COMMITTED?

"Are You INTERESTED Or Are You COMMITTED?" This is the question that created a turning point for John Assaraf - one of the leading mindset and behavior experts in the world. This question was asked by John's mentor when John was 19 when John shared with his mentor about his goal of being confident to achieve his finance freedom. And he made it happen because he chose to be committed - to do whatever it takes to achieve his goal.

If you are reading this, I believe you are somehow interested in personal development or entrepreneurship development or leadership development. I would like to invite you to get to the mindset of being COMMITTED to readily do whatever it takes to make your goal happen. And if you are committed, then helps more people around you to do so.

WHEN YOU ARE COMMITTED:

- You identify clearly what you want and the reason you want it

- You have a strong WHY

- You do not quit because you know current performance does not decide your future as long as you keep developing you

- You see failure as a great learning to take bolder action

- You are CONFIDENT and if you are note, you work to improve yourself to be confident

WHEN YOU ARE CONFIDENT:

- You are willing to try something new

- You are willing to learn

- You become committed more in what you do

THIS IS THE COMMITMENT and CONFIDENCE loop that helps us achieve our goal and be our best everyday!

Have a great Sunday my friends to be ready for a new week with more commitment in your goal!

Looking forward to seeing you in person!

Love live give,

Jen,

P/S: What's on next week

15 Jul - Public speaking and 7Cs leadership meeting https://www.meetup.com/Personal-and-Global-Leadership-Development/events/263117350/

17 Jul - Weekly Hanoi entrepreneur community  https://www.meetup.com/Leaders-Entrepreneurs-International-Community/events/qqmwtqyzkbxb/

Update our posts and recap for each week meetings:

• entrepreneurship topic: https://www.facebook.com/hanoientrepreneurcommunity/

• personal development topic: https://www.facebook.com/JenEmpowerLeaders

• leadership and public speaking topic: https://www.facebook.com/cspeakinggym/

To not be rush: Plan in advance

“How to not be hurry?”, I asked the owner of a photocopy shop!

“to plan yourself in advance”, he answered with a smile!

This afternoon, I went to print some documents for my meeting. I was welcomed by a big grin of the owner – a man at the age of 50. I sent the docs to his email and I found that the email didn’t send. He said “maybe you wrote the email incorrectly” and it was true.

I smiled and told him “I saw the number 99 in your email but I typed 98 without even knowing”.

He smiled gently “it is not a big deal. We don’t need always to be right and we do not need to blame ourselves. And no need to be hurry, just slow down and we can do things well”.

I am a big fan when it comes to some profound saying related to human behaviours and perspectives so I felt fascinated by his saying. I smiled and make a joke but somehow it was what I wanted to say from my heart “thank you. I love it. Please say it with more people so more people can love themselves more instead of blaming themselves and yes to not be hurry”.

He smiled gently and continued finishing up printing documents for me and put them in order carefully.

Before I left the shop, I asked him “So, what can we do to not be hurry?”

He smiled “to plan in advance. Each morning, plan what you do for the whole day, before going anywhere, take 15 to 30 minutes to plan in advance what you will do there, always plan ahead. If you need to print the documents for a meeting, print them at least 1 hour before that. If you need to go to work, leave early so the traffic does not rush you. Plan in advance”.

Wow, his gentle and nature way of sharing on the concept of planning made me feel excited as this is what I often share in my training videos or seminars. I asked him a question that people often asked me when it comes to planning “so does it take our freedom?”.

“We plan by ourselves so nobody takes our freedom. If we go to the office early, we complete work well, the boss does not need to manage us, we have freedom. If we go to a meeting early, our clients do not need to blame us or be cautious with us then control us in the next meeting. We have freedom because we decide”.

I left the shop and told him one more time while my heart was singing because of his simple but meaningful sharing “thank you, take care and please share your wisdom with more people”.

I am writing this post with a great feeling running through my heart because of the kindness and wisdom of the man!

Plan in advance so we do not need to be rushed by time or anyone and then we can take some moments to observe and see kindness and wisdom around us my friends!